Archive for November, 2008

Not So Subliminal MSN Ad

I don’t use Internet Explorer much (go get yourself a copy of Firefox) but MSN happens to be my homepage for IE. Anyway, I saw this ad for Kohl’s on MSN today and couldn’t help but notice the subliminal messaging.

kohls-msn-ad

In reality, Kohl’s just wants you to know that clicking their ad won’t force you away from the MSN page, but at first glance I thought wow that is pushy.

November 25, 2008 at 11:44 am Leave a comment

Wondering why you’re stuck announcing MAC games on ESPN2?

Probably because you keep referring to Central Michigan as Michigan. Also, mentioning about how the commentators, aka yourself, are just idiots (in regards to not understanding a coach’s call) probably doesn’t help either.

November 19, 2008 at 11:20 pm Leave a comment

One Magic Loogie

As I finished brushing my teeth this morning, I went to spit the toothpaste into the sink. As soon as I spit, I was hit in the eye with a small amount of toothpaste. I looked immediately at the faucet, thinking somehow the spit ricocheted off of it, but there was no evidence of that. I could think of nothing other than this clip from Seinfeld as I stood there wiping my eye.

Or perhaps it was something else that hit me coincidentally at the same time.

November 19, 2008 at 11:15 am Leave a comment

Giving 110 Percent

What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%?

Here’s a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

Then:

H-A-R-D-W -O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

and

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

But,

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

And,

B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.

A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty, that while Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, itʼs the Bullshit and Ass kissing that will put you over the top.

November 17, 2008 at 3:54 pm 4 comments

Falling asleep with the TV on will cost you

Ever fall asleep without setting the Sleep option on your TV? I do, a lot. I started to wonder how much not setting the Sleep was costing me. Here’s my calculation for a 19″ color TV. I know, time for an upgrade. (Watt info found here, prices here).

19 inch bedroom TV

1 Hour of usage = 70 Watts = .07 kilowatts

.07 * 4.5 (average amount of time before I wake up and turn off the TV) = 0.315 kW

Michigan Average price per kWH (1000 watts per hour) = 11.65 cents

$0.1165/kWH * 0.315kW = $0.0367

Yep, that’s right. Every night I leave my TV on for an extra 4.5 hours, I pay another 4 cents. Assuming this happens every night, thats $1.10 per month.

A 25″ LCD takes about double the power, so now you’re talking $2.20 a month in extra charges and wasted electricity.

November 5, 2008 at 4:36 pm Leave a comment

Do you have a legal copy of Windows?

The thought has never crossed my mind to check if I had a legal copy of windows, but Bill Gates makes it easy to find out. Not sure where or how this would ever come in handy, but I want to start searching for random buttons in MS menus.

windows legal copy

November 3, 2008 at 12:40 pm Leave a comment